Therapy
SEO title: Midlife Couples Therapy & Intensives | Eros Couples & Relationship Therapy
Meta description: Emotionally Focused, body-aware couples therapy for midlife partners facing perimenopause, attachment trauma, conflict, and distance. Online in AZ and MO; intensives in Show Low.
Headline
Therapy for midlife couples ready to stop the cycle and find each other again.
Emotionally Focused, body-aware couples therapy for the season when your body, your history, and your relationship all collide.
What therapy looks like here
At Eros, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), an attachment-based, research-supported model for couples is the primarily used modally. Somatic Experiencing training to work with the body, Gottman Method tools to steady high conflict, and sex therapy when intimacy needs care are all also incorporated.
In session, we slow everything down. We notice what happens between you, and what happens inside each of you, the moment it happens. Over time, the cycle that used to take over becomes something you can see, name, and step out of together.
My approach is:
Who I work with
Couples who feel like roommates. You're kind and busy, and you're lonely together.
Couples caught in midlife conflict. Rage, tears, or icy silence show up faster than either of you can stop them.
Couples where one or both partners carry attachment trauma. Midlife exhaustion has reopened old fears of abandonment or not being enough.
Couples whose intimacy has changed. Pain, low desire, or a body that feels unfamiliar has left closeness frozen or fraught.
Couples healing from betrayal. You want to rebuild safety and decide your path with support.
Polyamorous and consensually non-monogamous partners. Midlife changes are reshaping your agreements, jealousy, or sense of security.
This may not be the right fit if
There is current physical violence, threats, or coercive control in the relationship.
Either partner needs emergency or crisis care.
Either partner is in active, unmanaged addiction or acute psychiatric crisis.
You're looking for medical treatment of hormonal symptoms. (I'm glad to refer you to medical partners and work alongside them.)
You need custody evaluations, court letters, or other forensic services.
You'll be outside Arizona or Missouri during ongoing online sessions. (Couples from any state can travel to Show Low for an intensive.)
If any of these apply, I'm happy to suggest providers who can help.
How couples therapy is structured
Free 15-minute call to see whether we're a good fit.
First session together to understand what brought you here and begin mapping your cycle.
One individual session with each partner to understand your attachment history, health picture, and anything that's hard to say in the room. [Confirm your assessment format.]
Ongoing sessions together, with occasional individual sessions when they help the couples work.
Services and rates
Service
What it's for
Format
Fee
Couples therapy
Calming conflict cycles, healing attachment wounds, rebuilding closeness
Online, [75] minutes, weekly or every other week
[fee]
Intimacy support
Adapting to midlife body changes and rebuilding physical closeness
Integrated into couples sessions
[fee]
Couples intensive
Deep, focused work for couples in crisis, high conflict, or recovery after betrayal
In person in Show Low, AZ, [2–3] days, [hours] total
[intensive fee]
Individual sessions within couples work
Supporting one partner's part of the couples process
Online, 50 minutes, as needed
[fee]
Insurance: [e.g., I'm an out-of-network provider and can provide a superbill. Reimbursement isn't guaranteed.]
Cancellations: [48] hours' notice is required to cancel or reschedule. Late cancellations and missed sessions are billed at the full fee.
Good Faith Estimate: You'll receive one before we begin, as required by the No Surprises Act.
Online sessions and in-person intensives
Ongoing sessions take place by secure video for clients physically located in Arizona or Missouri at the time of each session. Intensives take place in person in Show Low, Arizona, and are open to couples from any state who travel here. [Add a line if you also see weekly clients in person.]
For online sessions, please:
Join from a private space where you won't be overheard.
Use a stable internet connection with video on.
Have all participating partners sit together in the same room.
What to expect in your first session
You don't need to prepare, and you don't need to tell your whole story at once. In our first session, we'll:
Talk about what's bringing you in now, and why now.
Begin naming the cycle that keeps pulling you apart.
Notice how each of your bodies responds as you talk.
Get clear on what you each hope will feel different.
We go at a pace both of you can handle. If things get heated, I'll slow us down.
Frequently asked questions
Can perimenopause really affect our marriage this much? It can. Many people find that hormonal shifts, poor sleep, and physical symptoms lower their stress tolerance and make emotions harder to manage. That strain lands on the relationship. Naming it often brings real relief for both partners.
Why do I feel so much rage lately? Rage often shows up when your nervous system is depleted and old hurts are close to the surface. It doesn't make you a bad partner. In therapy, we work with what the rage is protecting, and help your body find steadier ground.
What is attachment trauma, and why is it showing up now? Attachment trauma comes from early relationships where closeness didn't feel reliably safe. For years, you may have coped well. Midlife exhaustion can wear down those defenses, so old fears of abandonment or not being enough feel urgent again.
We live like roommates. Can that really change? Often, yes. Distance usually grows when reaching out has felt risky for a long time. We work to make reaching for each other feel safe again, emotionally and physically.
Why do I freeze when my partner wants to talk? Freezing is a nervous system response, not a choice. When a conversation feels threatening, your body may shut down to protect you. In our work, we help your body learn it's safe to stay.
Sex has become painful, or has stopped altogether. Can you help? Yes. I'll encourage a medical evaluation for any pain, and I'm glad to work alongside your OBGYN or pelvic floor therapist. Together we help you let go of pressure and find closeness that fits the body you have now.
Do you treat hormonal symptoms? No. I'm a therapist, not a medical provider. I help with the emotional and relational impact, and I collaborate with physicians and menopause specialists who treat the physical side.
Is this only for women in perimenopause? No. Midlife changes affect people of every gender. I work with any couple whose bond feels shaken by this season, including LGBTQ+ couples and polyamorous partners.
Will we have to relive our trauma? No. We work with what shows up in your body and your relationship now, in small doses. The goal is to feel safer together, not to retell every painful memory.
How long does couples therapy take? It varies. Many couples notice shifts within the first few months, and deeper change often takes [6–12] months.
Where do you see clients? Online throughout Arizona and Missouri, and in person in Show Low, Arizona, for intensives.
Ready to begin?
The first step is a free 15-minute call. You can ask anything, and we'll see whether this feels right for both of you.
Button: Book your free consultation